Trader Joe’s Jollof Rice Is a Total Fail

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Ya’ll, Trader Joe’s has let us down big time. Friends don’t let friends think Trader Joe’s Jollof Rice is anything like the real deal. It’s little more than a (sort of) spicy rice pilaf.

Well, it says “Jollof Seasoned” but nope, it misses there, too. Legit Jollof gets its bright orange color from pureed bell peppers and tomatoes, garlic, ginger, and fruity heat from Scotch bonnet or habanero chiles. Some versions use a little curry powder. And it is glorious. But Trader Joe’s? Trader Joe’s Jollof Rice is a total fail.

Jollof rice is West African and there’s plenty of debate over whose version is better – Nigeria or Ghana. It’s the progenitor to red rice in the American South. But this TJ’s rice mix doesn’t honor jollof the way it should. It’s not even the camping food version of jollof rice. And even worse, it’s made with parboiled rice, which always has an off-putting texture and flavor to me. If we’re going to cook it for 20 minutes anyway, why use parboiled? Ugh.

Since I knew we were already not actually dealing with real jollof rice, I went off script. I tossed some cubed chicken breast with Creole seasoning and approached it the way I make jambalaya. I cooked the chicken in a nonstick skillet and set it aside. Next up, I sauteed some diced green pepper until just softened and added the rice mix. Per the package, I added 3 cups of boiling water, brought it to a boil and simmered on low for 20 minutes.

Hard to believe this was made with something labeled jollof-seasoned rice mix, believe me, I know.

The mix already has salt and I didn’t add any other spices. Ya’ll, I still hate it, even for just a spicy rice pilaf. (It’s also not actually that spicy). I’m gonna put it in the fridge and see if it gets eaten if I don’t tell anyone it was from a jollof rice mix. I can’t stand to waste the chicken.

Obviously, I won’t buy it again. It’s one of the worst, most disappointing things I’ve had from TJ’s this year.

Please, please make real jollof rice sometime. There are a zillion youtube videos ready to take you through the process (it’s not hard) and the results are delicious. And if you want a shortcut, there’s a great little local, Nigerian woman-owned company here in Seattle called Naija Buka that makes jarred starter sauces for jollof rice and chicken stew. And you can order them on Amazon. The Jollof sauce has a little smokiness to it, and the Everything Sauce doesn’t. Both work for the rice!